January 19, 2009

VIOLENCE: Mother of teen victim starts 'Kari's Candle of Hope'

"There were little signs, small clues that something wasn’t right." stated April Amandon of the Lockport Union-Sun & Journal. 
Kari Gorman 18 was killed by her boyfriend Shawn Wolf 19 on July 26,2008 at Shawn's home on Balmer Road. After an argument, he reportedly shot and killed her, then drove to a cemetery in Youngstown and took his own life.
"it was only when the relationship ended in tragedy that all the warning signs came together." stated Kari's family.
For those of us who have survived domestic violence we recognize the symptoms. The alienation from friends and family, the constant checking in making sure of the person's every move, the threats of suicide if you want to end the relationship with them; things like this we are told are red flags of domestic violence. So why then in the year 2009 with all the supposed information regarding this topic freely available, are we loosing so many women to Domestic Violence. Only after the tragedy occurs do people wonder what could have been done differently for the outcome to have been altered. It confuses me why society constantly wonders at the murder of these women, when domestic violence has been a serious problem in every country since as far back as we can trace our roots. Yet society wants to do nothing to change this serious problem; in fact they turn the other way when confronted with family, friends or just aquaintences who are going through abuse. So how then do we combat this ever growing issue that no one wants to face and address?

How do you kill a cancer when it threatens to spread to the roots of the trees, you kill the cancer before it even gets started. So how do you stop domestic violence BEFORE it gets started, education and awareness. We must educate our youngest children and the oldest of adults. We must not be afraid to talk about it and discuss it openly, and we must not shun those who have gone through its effects. For those women who are going through it and who have survived its life long horrendous effects, talking about it is one way to break the cycle. 
The sudden violence was a shock to Kari’s family and friends, who never expected the teen’s life to end so abruptly.

“Your mind only lets so much in at a time, and then I think it goes backwards sometimes, too,” she said. “There’s still times I look at her picture, and I’m just waiting for her to come in (the door).”

This feeling has been felt by more families both in the United States as well as countries around the world, then should ever be felt. Domestic Violence is a cancer that is spreading throughout the United States and countries abroad, it is time we kill that cancer and save future victims and families from such a horrible tragedy as this. Kari' Candle of Hope is one of the ways this is being done.

Kari’s Candle of Hope, was began by Kari's family out of the tragedy and loss of her life. Out of tragedy came an organization in the grass roots stages;hoping to become a non-profit group that educates young people on dating violence. This is one of the biggest areas of education we need to target is our young people, our hope is that this organization goes far and becomes great! We also hope that they get as many young people to listen as they can, this will cut down on the amount of teens and young adults killed due to dating and domestic violence!!

1 comment:

  1. Excellent information. Bless you. For more information on dealing with domestic violence and learning the steps on transitioning from victim to survivor, you can read the book Another Search for Shelter. For more information, go to this website: http://jeannieclaire.webs.com